Monday, December 21, 2009

Cloudy With a Chance of Projectile Vomit

I was watching the news this morning while I rode my little (okay, big) guts out on the exercise bike and I was impressed by the odds of snow fall in the weather forecast. I wasn't really impressed by the snow (it's white, okay, grey, and really really cold, and I've seen enough of it in my day) but more by the odds ("There's a 30 % chance of snowfall on Thursday in such and such a place late into the afternoon").

So, as I set about my house-wifery today I began to think about the rooms in my house and what the chances were of certain events transpiring in them. And so, I give you, dear reader, The Hinckley Home Forecast:

What are the odds of this disaster of a kitchen staying just the way it is today despite my best efforts to find a second to clean it here or there?

Very good. I'd give it a 60-80% chance of remaining largely unchanged.

This bathroom has been scrubbed from shower to sink this morning because of a little poop in the tub incident involving 2 adorable, if poopy, 17 month olds. What are the odds it will make it through the week without a similar incident?

That's really anybody's guess, but I will be optimistic and give ourselves a 90% chance of a poop free tub for a week.

What are the chances that this over flowing laundry bin will receive the attention it is begging for today?
Not a chance. Sorry. My sweet husband just folded 4 loads last night and I'm not ready to start over again. 0-8%. Or maybe I should just call it a Red Wash Day (like a red burn day, as in don't do it).

Maggie's Room: What are the chances of the bed I just made staying made until bedtime?

Slight. I'd give it 5-15%. [Update: bed currently UNmade as Maggie just spent the last 15 minutes playing nap. No, not napping, just playing at it.]

Twins' Room: What are the chances of the recently shampooed carpets staying puke free for the day? (Will's cough has been so bad lately that sometimes it brings up puke with the phlegm. Awesome.)

I'm going to give this one a moderate chance of success: 75%-90%.

What are the chances of the 12.5 foot Christmas tree staying upright despite having previously fallen over twice?

100%. After the falling fiascos of several weeks ago, the tree has been tied in 4 places to the surrounding banisters. Not going anywhere.

What are the chances of the Hinckley Family actually doing any of the activities on their Christmas Advent Calendar?

Slim to none. Darn it. We're still managing to have the Christmas spirit, however.

Chances of having an insane day but good in it's own insane way?

Absolutely certain.


Dan said...

I think it was more like 8 loads of laundry (2 loads of towels, 2 loads of whites, 3 loads of darks and 1 load of puked on clothes, bedding and toys). I don't think there were any other clean clothes in the entire house.

I'm excited for Christmas!

Kimberlee said...

LOVE this post Megs. You're keeping it real and it makes me feel better as a mother of 3. P.s. That's why you haven't heard from me in 4 months...I don't know who you do it.

Andrea said...

I LOVE how you decorate. Can't get over it. Maggie's room is perfect. Absolutely fabulous. Where did you get all the hanging things and bedspread and whatnots??? I am definitely shopping in the wrong places.

the fellers said...

this is the best post, I LOVE that my kitchen is not the only kitchen that looks like that, and I LOVE that Maggie plays nap! haha Merry Christmas!

K said...

And what are the chances that the Randles love you, even in light of the chances of bedlam and chaos in your house? I'd say - oh - about 150 percent????

jwise said...

What a great post. I loved getting to see your very cute house in the process, too.

Leslie said...

I love your blog. And I love the fact you tie your tree to the banister. I alone, knocked mine over twice one year... and I was in my 30s.

Kati said...

Megan- that was by far the most clever blog post I have ever scene! SO FUNNY- SO REAL- and I have to mentions SO FUNNY once again! I do love how you decorated the twins room!! So CUTE!


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