But I got a dozen roses on my birthday. That's right. A dozen. See, there's this place by the prison by where Dan works that sells roses--cheap.
So, Dan handed me some cash and told me to run in there and pick some out.
I went in the scary old warehouse that is a good 150 yards off the main road and found nothing and nobody in it. 'Cept there was this button and a sign that said "Ring for service." I rang it. Nothing. I rang it again and this guy comes out of nowhere and stares at me.
"You got roses?" I asked.
And instead of answering he just started walking away.
But then he stops and motions for me to follow him. We go over to the rusty old door leading to a walk in refrigerator. He opens it and points over at the roses and motions for me to go pick some out. If I hadn't had Dan waiting for me in the car, I wouldn't have gone in. I mean I could have been locked in there to die--or worse. But the dude held open the door while I grabbed a bunch of pretty ones.
Then I was kinda shook up so I hurriedly thrust the money at him and started for the door. But he reached over and took the roses from me. He walked over to a table and wrapped them in brown paper and taped it up. Then he gave me the parcel and walked away.
And I made a run for the car.
Safely in the passenger seat of the Pilot, I laughed as I recounted the episode to Dan.
"Yep," he said. "That's kinda how it always goes."
"Well, did you think to warn me?" I asked.
"Nah!" He replied. "Happy Birthday, Sweetie."
And a great birthday it was, too.
If you need some roses for somebody's birthday, I know a guy...